Monday, September 17, 2007

Quotes that happen when, as of 10 am, you've been awake for 4.5 hours

During our Malaysia Airlines flight to Kuala Lumpur, we were treated to a short video advertising the merits of their Temptations in-flight shopping line.

In that video, an attractive enough western woman is suffering the affections of the jolly-sized Asian man across the aisle, complete with splotchy facial hair and a Hawaiian shirt, when she notices a handsome Asian man a few rows up (with, I should add, spectacular hair). She attempts to tune out the noise from her plus-sized companion and get the attention of the hottie with the empty seat next to him. Suddenly, she has a chance. He looks back down toward the aisle and waves his hand. She waves back...a connection is made!

But no, it turns out he was waving to the flight attendant in the aisle just behind the woman, who is carrying a bag of fantastic Malaysia Airlines Temptations merchandise. Our heroine is mortified and buries her head in her hands. Even the tubby motherfucker across the aisle gets a laugh at her expense. When all hope is lost, a chocolate bar suddenly drops down on the tray table in front of her. Our lady looks up to find that Asian hottie is standing over her, smiling beatifically. And they all lived happily ever after.

Except my friends and I wondered about what became of the other suitor.

"The poor fat guy," one of our company lamented. "He gets nothing."

"It's just like real life," sighed another.

A third among us was decidedly less sympathetic. "That's what he gets for being fat," he snarled.

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